Once a chemistry teacher was entering the class, he unfortunately collided with a lady physics teacher. The lady teacher scolded the chemistry teacher,"you Newton, can't you control your velocity? Are you suffered from both myopia and hypermetropia? If so, no any lens would fit you and only microscopic lens would enable you to see the world. Listening to these words, the chemistry teacher become furious at that time and told," first you tried to combine with me to a from covelent bond, so that, your smile will also act as a catalyst" so, i changed in to sodium". The solubility of my heart has increased to dissolve you even in my super saturated heart. The lady teacher screamed," the center of gravity of your heart is unstable and you have high upthrust. Your body has high centripetal mass towards me. By conduction and radiation the heat of your hand, which has specific capacity has transferred on me and has increased my heat capacity." So water present inside my body has changed in to water vapour. If you talk like that i will reduce your frequency of sound in to horse sound. So, if you look at me like that, then due to the absorption of all the rays, you will see black only. The chemistry teacher become so angry and said," you aquaregia! If you shout like that i will change you in to salt and your metal like hair in to coal. You high molecular weight compound, i'll change you in to smallest part of atom. Molecular arrangement of diamond like structure of teeth in to Ruther ford's scattering like model." The lady teacher became quiet, silent and told," the angle of incidence you made with me was greater than the critical angle, so instead of getting total internally reflected of your body, how did you collide with me? The chemistry teacher told," there is your fault also, if you talk like that then in presence of suitable reagent like pt in office, the substitution and reduction reaction will occur and you would be out of the valance shell of our college. The anger of lady teacher has crossed her resistance. She then scold, if you produce a sound again, then according to the Flemings hand rule, my four fingers act as radioactive gun and your magnetic attraction like feelings in to a, b,g,and you will be at hell dancing with skeleton. You will be so far that Newton's law of gravitation will not affect you.
**How's Newton's law applied to man: - First law states," Every student continues in their talk until and unless teacher applied some external force on them". - Second law states," The face of monkey is directly proportional to the man and indirectly proportional to the product of their leg and tail." - Third law states," when someone teases a girl(action) then the girl's sandal kisses the doer (reaction)."** **some ladies, who were determined to put one end to drinking in their colony, went to the house of a retired army officer one evening."when did you last have a drink?" they asked. "1945" replied the officer. "That is very good" remarked the ladies very happily. "so you are a good man now?" " I would call it exactly that," replied the officer, looking at his watch." you see it is only 2015 now."** **A boy was caught stealing a watch from a shop. He was taken to a police station and put in a lock-up. A hardcore criminal showed up and saine,"you are wasting time on small items. Why don't you rob a bank?" The boy replied,"By the time i leave school all banks are closed." ** ** Madan was in class II. He was having his exams. After he finished his English exam, friends asked him how he did. He replied." the exam was good but i didn't know the past tense of think. So, i thought, thought, thought and wrote Thunk.** ** The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying any attention in class. She called on him and said,"Johnny! What are 4, 2, 28, and 44?"Little Johnny quickly replied,"NBC, CBS, HBO and the cartoon Network!** **A guy walks in a bar and buys a huge beer. Then he sees someone he knows and decides to go and say hi to him, but he doesn't want to drag his beer mug with him. So, he sets it on a table, along with a note "i spit in this beer" hoping that none will steal it then, upon return, he sees another note saying "Me too!".
